Thread: the need to let it out...

hi,

i am new here but as i was going through the topics available in the forum i found this...

I am 28 years old and i have been battling with depression as it turns out for years... things came to a head just over 1 year ago when my daughter was very ill, it was a sudden illness and it almost took her life, i had to be strong during that time and i was alone with her at the hospitals, my partner could not be there as our home was under fire threat a the time also,

when we got home i went into deep depression and sought from the doctors, i have also been attending counsling sessions, after some trial and error getting the right person to talk to i met my current pschologist,

within the two weeks i had seen her we discovered a underlying issue i had refused to deal with... i was sexually abused by my stepfather and IT WASN"T MY FAULT!!!! i was also emotionally abused by my mother and IT WASN"T MY FAULT!!!

it took me 2 weeks to really understand that concept because from the moment my innocence was shattered, my right to a safe and happy home destroyed, i always believed it was my fault... not anymore!!

i was a young child who had no reasoning ability and this horrible selfish man inflicted horror and more sickening guilt and doubt into my young mind..

the more we speak up and let it be known the less this will go on...
there are more and more young people out there that are suffering as i did some take it worse than i and take thier own lives...

it continues to be a problem for me but little by little i am beginning to feel whole and loved again...

thank you for listening
sinann

Thank goodness you have recognised it wasn't your fault and are slowly moving away from an horrific past where you should have been loved and cared for, rather than abused so badly by people you should have been able to trust.

Sometimes, things like this can lurk, deep down inside us, for so long until another dreadful situation arises, in your case your child being ill, then it all comes to the fore.
Good for you for seeking help when you knew you needed it and turning things around. The only way is up for you now.

I wish you all the best